F is for Friends That Do Stuff Together

Most people that know me well understand the fact that I've had a bit of a complicated and trying last 6 months or so. I've experienced some of my fondest memories during this period, but in a way I was thrown into the deep end in more way than one. The first most obvious one came in the form of acclimating myself to this so called "single life" and the obvious trials that have occurred during that transition. However, that's not the particular direction I plan on writing about tonight. I'm devoting tonight to explaining the very real struggles of attempting to make friends as a 23 year old guy in a new city and with basically no practice at it during the last 5 years.

Your first thought is probably, "what in the world does Noah mean by no practice??" Let me explain. During the last 5 years, I really made close to zero effort to develop close and worthwhile friendships with all of the new people that I found myself surrounded by throughout college. I mean, I hung out with people. I saw the same people 4 days a week on my soccer team for years. I worked with the same people on projects for multiple years, but I never really became close with them. I possessed more of a professional or coworker type dynamic rather than any sort tight knit, reliable connection with any of them. You may rightfully ask yourself how I could possibly have achieved that incredible level of separation from those around me? How could I know the same people for years and just never develop any sort of close connection with the people I saw daily?? It sounds ludicrous, but I'll tell you how. It was easy.

Throughout those years, I poured all of my personal feelings and emotions into my long-time girlfriend and a few already established best friends of mine rather than sharing anything personal or revealing with those immediately around me. In the last 5 years, I can count on one hand the number of new people that I have truly opened up to and would feel comfortable going to right now if I needed something, and I wouldn't even fill up the whole hand!!

This all leads up to my present day conflict. Right now, I'm living in a big shiny new city with millions of fresh faces around that all have a different story to tell. The only problem...I lack the faintest idea of how to properly go about finding out any of those stories. I've been out of the friend making game for too long, and I've forgotten all of the tricks of the trade. I feel like I'm playing checkers while everyone else graduated to chess years ago. How do I go about making worthwhile friendships without seeming like a complete lunatic? I mean, everyone is a little crazy, but how do I go about getting close enough so that we can bond in our mutual lunacy?

I do realize that I'm speaking in a lot of ridiculous rhetorical questions, but I don't really care. This blog is meant for me to vent a bit and say things that are on my mind. I know that growing up everyone always says "not to over think things". "Just be yourself". Well, I'll have you know that over thinking things is one of my favorite past times, and it sometimes feels like the people around me can't quite handle me being "myself".

All this being said, I still have a pretty amazing life. The few close friends I do have are incredible, I am enjoying learning my new job, and I still have the best family in the world. I know that friendships will develop for me as long as I keep working at them. Just like anything worthwhile, I can only get out of it what I'm willing to put into it. Fortunately for me, I now understand the importance of friendship, and I've got fresh legs coming off the bench.

Diving In Soccer Needs To Be Eliminated

Here's the video link to Fred's dive yesterday (Photo taken by Thanassis Starakis)

Alright, I am going to tackle a subject that is very near and dear to my heart...flopping in sports. If you are an avid soccer fan like I am, it's something that has gotten all too prevalent in recent years. As many people often remark, "people do it because it's effective for winning fouls and/or goals". Although that is true, punching opposing players in the face to leave them bleeding on the floor also aids your team in scoring goals, but I guess surprisingly enough, you don't see people do that all that regularly!! Why would that be I wonder?? Why would one action which achieves the same end result as another action be some much more commonplace in sport?!? I'll tell you why. One of them you'll get banned and/or fined for and the other will simply get you a bad reputation and some pundit finger-wagging until the next influential dive and he takes the spotlight. It's absolute incomprehensible garbage!!

I'm tired of watching the sport of love and care so much about be tarnished by these classless buffoons that go down with their arms raised yelling at the ref about a foul that never happened. Yesterday in the World Cup kick-off match between Brazil and Crotia, Brazil's incredibly mediocre forward Fred (yes, that is really his name) threw himself down in the box to a supposed foul from Croatian defender Dejan Lovren. You can watch the flop at he link below the top picture. Not only did this non-existent foul award Brazil with a penalty which completely changed the game, but it also caused Lovren to receive a yellow card which could cause him to miss a match later in the tournament. And how will FIFA likely deal with this incident? By shrugging it off and letting this issue perpetuate as usual. And it's not like FIFA is opposed to instilling swift decisive judgement on wrongdoers. All you have to do is look to the 2010 World Cup in South Africa where FIFA helped set up 56 special courts throughout South Africa for the month long tournament which dealt with everyone from muggers to Dutch women wearing orange dresses advertising a beer that wasn't Budweiser (it's official sponsor).

So how can we go about solving this seemingly unavoidable problem? Punish the players flopping!!! It really is as simple as that!! Do the same thing that every other sporting organization on the planet does. Review the video and punish the cheating pieces of crap until they're more scared of the punishment then they are desiring the motivation to cheat. It's a simple cost analysis problem. If every time a player is caught with video evidence of flopping for a call, fine them $10,000. That will get their attention quickly for the second transgression, fine them $30,000. And on a third or fourth time, fine them and give them a game's suspension!! It can't be any simpler than that. Every European league already does it with any sort of violent conduct. Why should diving not be enforced the same way?! Luis Suarez is 2013 got an 8-match ban as well as a £40,000 fine for biting Branislav Ivanovic's arm. I guarantee you he won't be trying that stunt anytime soon.

Luis Suarez biting Branislav Ivanovic

This really is a serious issue that needs to be addressed. Not only does it cheaper our beautiful game, but for us Americans it just makes it that much harder to gain respect and grow as a sport within our country. We already have a bad reputation as a pansy non-athletic sport to most of America, please don't give them even more reason to believe that.

Start Off By Making Your Bed

Well, I am officially a college graduate now. It's a kind of odd idea that I won't ever be sitting in crammed classrooms struggling to stay awake or cramming for the next days test due to those repeated days of sleeping. I suspect that the feeling won't completely sink in until August rolls around and I hear of others starting classes while I'll be moving up to Dallas to start my real world job. Fortunately for me, last night at my Commencement ceremony, I received some incredibly valuable knowledge from our keynote speaker. Admiral William H. McRaven who is a former Longhorn, trained Navy Seal, and was the lead coordinator of the raid that got Osama Bin Laden. In his speech, he spoke of the 10 lessons that he learned in Seal Training that he hoped would help move us forward in life. I won't go through the whole list (here's the link to the whole speech), but I will note one of the biggest points that resonated with me. Due to the fact that I know I won't do justice to his words, I will simply place his first anecdote here.

Every morning in basic SEAL training, my instructors, who at the time were all Viet Nam veterans, would show up in my barracks room and the first thing they would inspect was your bed.

If you did it right, the corners would be square, the covers pulled tight, the pillow centered just under the headboard and the extra blanket folded neatly at the foot of the rack—rack—that’s Navy talk for bed.

It was a simple task—mundane at best. But every morning we were required to make our bed to perfection.  It seemed a little ridiculous at the time, particularly in light of the fact that were aspiring to be real warriors, tough battle hardened SEALs—but the wisdom of this simple act has been proven to me many times over.

If you make your bed every morning you will have accomplished the first task of the day.  It will give you a small sense of pride and it will encourage you to do another task and another and another.

By the end of the day, that one task completed will have turned into many tasks completed. Making your bed will also reinforce the fact that little things in life matter.

If you can’t do the little things right, you will never do the big things right.

And, if by chance you have a miserable day, you will come home to a bed that is made—that you made—and a made bed gives you encouragement that tomorrow will be better.

If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed.

-Admiral William H. McRaven

Needless to say, I couldn't disobey a direct order from such a high ranking official. My bed was properly made for the first time in probably 2 years!! I love what this story signifies. Starting with a simple win in the bag helps to create a mental edge for the rest of the day. If you start by accomplishing something and seeing the satisfaction of completing that menial task, it allows your mind to see the enjoyment that comes with seeing a goal through to completion. This effect really does seem to work. I made my bed when I woke up and next I cleaned my whole room of clutter and junk. It's almost as clean as the first day I moved in 4 years ago! Then a few hours later after getting home, I summoned the motivation to cleaned the rest of the apartment. I even swiffered all the dirt stains off the wood floors which I've only ever done once in the last four years...

Needless to say, I had a pretty productive day, and I firmly believe that this speech had a great impact on that. It's been a wonderful 5 years at The University of Texas. It's had tons of high points along with a few low ones, but I wouldn't trade any of my experiences. I've grown and learned so much as a person these last 5 years, and I'm proud to say that, even on my last day as a Longhorn undergrad, I still learned something amazing. Thank you Admiral McRaven for your wonderful words of wisdom, and thank you University of Texas for contributing to the man I am today.

Finding Audrey

I thought today being Audrey Hepburn's birthday, it would make sense to commemorate such a classy and amazing woman by telling the story of how I got MY Audrey and how I came to name her after such an inspirational icon.

Well, the story starts back freshman year of high school. I began to get obsessed with classic cars (in particular Ford Mustangs) when my Dad and I discovered a few classic car dealers near our lake house in Conroe, TX. After discovering them, I forced my Dad to always take me to them and check out all of the beautiful pieces of history that to me had so much more character than present day cars. Thus started my determination to get a classic Mustang as my first car.

I read books. I did research. I spent hours on Ebay and classic car sale websites looking for great deals on 1965-1966 Mustangs. I knew every detail about these cars. I could tell you their history. I could tell you the year with a single glance. I consumed every possible ounce of information in order to show how my parents how determined I was to get an old Mustang.

As I got into my junior year, I felt the tides turning in my favor. My Dad started to slip over to my side and thought it would be a ton of fun to have a father-son project with fixing up this beautiful old piece of history. This takes us to my 17th birthday the summer before my senior year. 

I woke up on my birthday without really expecting anything special. I don't remember if it was when I woke up in the morning or later at night. I just remember standing around the living room with my family when my parents gave me a gift bag. When I pulled out what was inside, It was a simple framed picture. That framed picture still hangs in my room within arms reach of me typing this post.

(It was this picture in the frame)

The three kids standing in the car are my cousins. The kids of my uncle in California that I knew supported me getting my dream car. I immediately recognized what was going on and freaked out!! My parents informed me that my Uncle Ralph found a really good deal on a 1965 Mustang at a swap meet in Los Angeles and immediately called my Dad. My parents decided that it was too good of a deal to pass up and decided to surprise me on my birthday! Sadly, I had to wait another month to see her while she was being shipped across the country, but I couldn't complain! I was on cloud 9!!

Thus started one of the longest months ever. I knew that I wanted to give her a name. Any classic car deserves to have a suitable name to really show how special they are to their owners, and my car was no different. Therefore, the brainstorming began.

I spent weeks thinking of names. I felt like a single dad that was forced to name his newborn daughter. I knew that I wanted something classy. Some name that to me just spoke of elegance, because, unlike what most people believe, Mustangs were not originally created as muscle cars. They weren't originally very powerful or meant to be on racetracks. That spawned out of the later generations and into the muscle car craze of the 70's.

I still distinctly remember when I came up with her name. While vacationing in Lake Tahoe with my family, I slept soundlessly in one of the downstairs beds, and that's when I had a very vivid dream. I dreamt that I sat in the backseat of our family Suburban (the car I actually took to college with me), and I asked my family who was in the car with me what they thought of the name Audrey for my new car. My whole dream family loved the name!! They all thought it was a perfect fit for my dream car.

Fortunately, I remembered my dream when I woke up. I loved Audrey Hepburn ever since my parents showed me My Fair Lady as a young kid, so when I remembered the name, it really just felt right. I then went to have breakfast with the family and told them about my dream. As if already decided by fate, they all loved it just like they did in the dream! Thus stuck the name of my soon to be partner in crime, Audrey.

She's come a long way since I first got her. She looks quite different then she used to, but she's still my pride and joy. It's been a long 6 years together with plenty of blood, sweat, and tears (literally!), but she's been worth it all. Thanks for all the memories Audrey, and here's to a lifetime more of them.

I Should Probably Be Asleep

Well, I decided that I am finally comfortable enough to write about this topic. Most people that are close to me know about the fact that I recently went through a break up. I dated one of the best girls that I've ever known throughout most of my college life. However, although I care about her immensely, I couldn't shake the feeling that I needed to try being single during some of my adult life. I have now been single for almost 3 months, and I'm starting to realize that I'm just not very good at it. Let me explain...

There are two types of single. The type that just want to be casual and fool around for a night and then go their separate ways, and the type that are analyzing everyone of the opposite sex as a possible mother of their future children. I, however, fall into an odd middle ground. Having been in a serious relationship for almost the last 5 years of my life, I am hesitant about the idea of getting back into a committed relationship. But at the same time, I am not really the type of guy that can just casually have a fling with a girl that I am not interested in at all.

However, I can't help but label every physically attractive girl that I meet and enjoy talking to as a candidate for a serious relationship. Because of this conflict, I feel at times like Golem from Lord of the Rings with my incompatible inner dialogues. It's infuriating!!! Like I said, I'm just not good at this whole being single and keeping things casual thing. I'm not Fabio. I'm not a womanizer. I'm much better at being a boyfriend. That's what I'm used to. I feel like a complete fish out of water.

I hope that it gets easier as time goes on and I get more comfortable with it, but at the moment, I just feel like I'm treading water and everyone just keeps stepping on my head and think they're helping. I am definitely not enjoying single life as much as I would have anticipated. I'm naturally a lazy person. If I can ever find an easy solution to something, I will exploit it. This whole single life is way more work than I foresaw and there's no cheat sheet that I've been able to figure out. And at the moment...it's way more than I bargained for.

Life Is All About Balance

The more I experience life and learn more about the world, the more I realize that the importance of balance. I actually just talked to my brother about this particular topic and that's what spurred me to write this post. Any activity in life can be unsuccessful due to lack of balance. A basketball team will always lose if they pass 100% of the time and never shoot. A dog will be spoiled if they only ever get treats and never get disciplined. And a student's college experience will never be fulfilled if they always sit inside and never go out to meet other people.

In many ways, my college experience lacked this attribute. Early on, I fell into a comfortable routine which I convinced myself had all I wanted and ignored the inclinations to go and experience anything out of the ordinary. This wasn't caused by anyone or anything in particular. It was simply my default, lazy mode. I've always been fairly lazy in that sense.

I still remember being in middle school and having my Mom asking during the summer why I wasn't going to hang out with friends. I would always respond with the same dumb answer, "Eh, I just don't feel like hanging out with anyone". That was never really true. It's not like I lacked any friends to call up or hated having a friend to play Tony Hawk's Pro Skater with. The fact of the matter was I simply lacked the motivation to get up the nerve to call people. I convinced myself that sitting alone at home was enough to tide me over until a friend would call me up instead. Sadly, this habit persisted during much of my college career. Until recently, my cruise control mode remained engaged with no particular inclination of switching off.

This past year has easily been the most enjoyable year of college. It's had its hiccups and rough nights, but, overall, it created incredible memories and lessons that I will never forget. I am an incredibly annoying barrier of letting myself go out and have fun. If there's the slightest reason why I should not go out and do something, I typically latch onto it and allow it to keep me in that night. However, those times I give in those outings I was initially reluctant about, I always have a great time. That's why I have learned to ignore those thoughts and remember how much fun I have when I hangout with people.

I still have those extremely lazy days (like today). And I have those nights that I just refuse to leave my apartment and do anything. That's not the point. The point is that there needs to be a balance. A balance between alone time/inner reflection and group activities/adventure. Each person has there own particular balance that they need, but the fact is that you need to be open to always testing that balance. Step outside of your comfort zone and try something different because those will become the great memories and stories that will last.

Life After School

To say that the last two months have been a bit of a roller coaster is putting it extremely lightly. The incredible number of new experiences that have come and gone have made this one of the most memorable periods in my life. However, in less than a month, I will begin a completely new adventure that makes my heart race more than anything that's happened recently. I will soon be a college graduate and start my first "real world" job.

My academic record is anything but pristine, and just a couple of months ago, I had no job in the works for when I graduated. However, I broke the bank when I withdrew more luck than most people ever experience, and I somehow managed to get a job that suits me better than I could ever have imagined. As much as I am looking forward to starting work at Etherios, I am more excited at the infinite possibilities of being totally on my own and living in a new city with one of my best friends.

My brothers and I have always been fairly independent people. We prefer to get things done ourselves, and if we don't know how, we figure it out. It's a Quintana thing. That being said, I have never been truly independent. I am fortunate to have parents that have provided me with everything that I have ever needed (and some), and, because of that, I have never really known complete independence. It may get old quickly having to keep track of every little detail of my life, but I can just tack it onto my list of firsts.

Life for me at the moment is light years from where I was expecting two months ago. Plans that I had will most likely never see the light of day and will simply be locked away in my own mind. At the moment though, I'm just loving the adventure and the beginning of a new step in a life that has already seen and done so much. So thank you Austin for a great college experience. Let's finish this last month with a bang.

Never Say Never

As anyone who has had more than a 5 minute conversation with me would know, I am very passionate about my opinions. That being said, these snap judgments typically set me up to have to eat crow later on down the road. On those occasions when I give things a second chance, I'm always pleasantly surprised when my feelings have changed. Many of my favorite bands, movies, and people were first passionately despised before I later gave them another chance with a more open mind. 

When the whole Lana Del Rey obsession happened a couple years ago, I hated her music. I thought the way she sang was "moany" and obnoxious. I failed to understand what everyone found so great about her songs. Fast forward a few years and I mention her in conversation to a friend, but he hasn't heard of her. I instantly get on YouTube in order to show him how annoying her music sounds. Or at least that was the plan. As the song kept playing, I got legitimately confused because I was actually liking the song. It made no sense! I had decided years ago that I disliked her music!! What was the problem?? After that, I decided to check out her whole CD, and, to my great surprise, I loved it!! I'm even jamming out to her as I write this post!

It is still an infrequent event that I change my opinion towards something, but it is definitely getting more and more common as the years go on. Therefore, I request that if anyone ever hears me say that I "will never like something", please refer me back to this list: Radiohead, Mario Balotelli, Lana Del Rey, Archer, and See's Lollipops. I know there are many more that I can't think of at the moment, but this is a pretty solid list. Maybe some day I'll even come to enjoy peanut butter or baseball. On second thought, maybe just peanut butter...

Traditions Are A Must

I talked with a friend last night about A&M and their school traditions. The Aggies claim the title of most tradition heavy school of any university in Texas and possibly the nation!! They have so many different ceremonies and customs that each and every one of their students feels compelled to participate in them for fear of being a "2 percenter". Some of the traditions are kind of dorky, but some are incredibly fun. This talk of traditions made me think about what particular family traditions I grew up enjoying, so I thought that I would talk about 3 of my favorites. Here they go:

1. Smashing a slice of birthday cake in the birthday boys face - This tradition was mostly only supported by my Dad. My Mom would always try to convince him to not do it, but she would be inevitably overruled by 4 other sons that were all lining up to be the person that got to commit the treacherous act. This is definitely a tradition that I will be putting to use with my future children. Lots of laughs were always had.

(Or sometimes the neighbor would step in to lend a hand!!)

2. Roasting a pig for big family occasions - This typically occurs on 3 different holidays: Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years. As Cubans, my family loves pork. Depending on the size of the get together, we do anything from one sizable leg to a whole 200 lb entire pig. Either way, it always comes out delicious and makes me overeat way too much.

(Dad, brother, and cousin checking the goods)

3. Books to send each child to college with - This one has probably meant the most to me personally. Maybe it is because I wasn't expecting it; none of my brothers mentioned this tradition to me before I received it. To each of the five boys, my parents have given the same 4 books: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, The Wealthy Barber, a new Bible, and The Book of Virtues. I've only really taken advantage of 2 out of 4 of these books, but that's not too terribly. The part that really made this gift significant to me was the one on the right in the picture simply called On Life. It is a written account of my life according to my Dad which documents all of the significant events in my life from my birth to the end of my senior year of high school. It is all broken down by year. Each son got one of these. Obviously, there are key events missing that I would include in my own autobiography (first kiss, favorite soccer moment, etc), but there was so much detail and love given from my Dad's account of my life as well as my parents lives that I would never have known otherwise.

After his personal account of my life, he goes on to impart advice and knowledge about specifics subjects such as college, marriage, children, and money. This simple 28 page document means a lot more to me than most anything else in my apartment. I'm pretty sure that if there was a fire and I only had 30 seconds to grab whatever I needed. The only two items I would grab would be the hard drive out of my computer and this incredible little book.

Nothing better than some pancakes and soccer on a Saturday afternoon

I Hate Network News

One of my biggest pet peeves is when people (generally older) see something on the news or on the "world wide web" and try and generalize how terrible the world is turning into. Typically, when I hear someone try and claim that, I make two critical judgments about them. 1) They are not very well educated about the history of the world and 2) it's probably not worth my time to try and convince them otherwise. When you look throughout the history of Earth, today undoubtedly is the best time to live in. Granted, maybe certain things have gotten worse. The glaciers probably aren't the most thrilled with humans at the moment, and, yes, certain diseases such as cancer have become a much scarier threat. Overall though, I'd much rather live through the unintentional consequences of human development such as global warming and child obesity than having to worry about being shipped off to Germany to fight Nazis or wondering whether the Russians are going to end all human life. However, the real issues such as global warming typically aren't even the examples people claim when they argue the world is going to the dogs. They wouldn't use the ozone layer or fat middle school kids as examples, because those are actually their fault. The baby boomers. The real problems that these highly evolved individuals point towards are the really hard hitting issues that shape our world's future. Things such as kids playing too many video games and random ghetto kids attacking people for gang initiation. And what's to blame for them believing this. 24-hr news.

Yes. News networks love to blow anything and everything out of proportion. It's what they strive for, because they know that there are millions of uneducated people that will gobble it up like a fat kid on the last cupcake. The news is no longer about focusing on the important issues or making people question relevant topics that need explaining. It's about ratings and views. Granted, some networks and news sources are better than others, but the majority of them are interchangeably useless. News will latch onto absolutely anything and rant about it for weeks and weeks making it seem like judgment day. Why?? Because most people don't care and it gets them ratings. Do these networks really care about this random Malaysian flight that went missing? No. They couldn't care less, but there's nothing else interesting enough to the average layman for them to change the subject. There's no big war to talk about, Justin Bieber has kept out of the lime lite, and the controversy with Russia and Ukraine is too complicated for them to want to delve into that mess. Explaining a celebrity DUI or a disappearing plane is much simpler. My favorites are when they latch onto whatever troubling teenage fad is going on at the moment.

A few months ago, when the whole story broke about the whole "knockout game", everyone over the age of 40 were losing their minds over it. Here's a video if you don't know what I'm talking about.

I actually even got a phone call from my mom asking if I've ever heard of anyone playing this stupid game and warning me to be careful. No Mom. People I know don't play that because I don't live in Detroit or Compton, or it's the fact that it is not a normal activity. The fact of the matter is that anything that being reported on the news is not normal or regular enough to worry about. If it was worth stressing over, it wouldn't be on the news. I guarantee it. Why can't the news networks just do something constructive by maybe trying to figure out the cause of the activity such as an spike in urban poverty and make that the focal point of the discussion? Maybe because that's just too complicated of a question to try and answer. Fear mongering is much less complicated.

The fact of the matter, and the reason for this long winded post, is that with the structure of today's news networks being 24-hrs a day, you have to take the stories that talk about with a grain of salt. Think of it as if you're sitting in a 12 hour interview for a job where everything you say matters. At some point, you're gonna run out of things to say and just latch onto anything you can say to keep appearing interesting, and only the interviewers that are still conscious are going to call you on your bullshit.

Speaking Up In Class

I'm not sure where this particular habit comes from, but, for as long as I can remember, I have always felt the need to step up and try and answer questions in class when everyone else refuses to bite the bullet. There's just something so depressing about seeing a teacher trying to stimulate a class only to see the enthusiasm drain from their face when they realize it's so obviously not working. It honestly breaks my heart. Some teachers bounce back from their disappointment alright and just put people on the spot to answer, but from my experience it's the younger teachers (such as my Intro to Philosophy teacher) that take it harder and seem to refuse to call someone out and force them to start the collaboration.

There's something so satisfying when you inevitably raise your hand and see the blood rush back to their face and a new exuberance to discuss whatever monotonous topic they brought up to begin with. There is almost an unspoken "thank you" to express how grateful they are to escape from a rather awkward situation. Typically, their appreciation allows them to not judge whatever bogus reply you blurt out in the process. You can try and claim that Paul Revere defeated Hitler at The Battle of Bunker Hill in 1492, and they would still let you down gently just to ensure that others wouldn't feel threatened to join in the conversation. I may not be curing Polio or rescuing a kitten from a tree, but, every time I get to bail a teacher out by speaking up in class, it makes me feel like I did my charitable deed for the day.

The Best Things Happen While You're Dancing

One of the few inherently Cuban characteristics that I am fortunate to have inherited from my parents is my ability to dance. Let's clarify one thing. I am no professional. I don't do any fancy foxtrots or waltzes, and I can't blow the mind of those around me. However, growing up going to numerous Cuban parties where Salsa dancing is almost a prerequisite for entry, I have gained enough confidence and ability to hold my own in whatever dancing setting I stumble into. Luckily for me, I appear rather impressive to the average person since most have little to no experience with dancing. I have exploited my rare knowledge since middle school. When you're 1 out of 100 kids that possesses the ability to recognize the basic beat of a song, it creates a lot of confidence and also puts you in pretty high demand. I don't know how many times I've taught people how to do a basic salsa step. It really is way easier than people realize. It obviously takes a little practice to make it look really natural and do more flashy of moves, but the basics take little to no effort. 

I don't dance as often anymore as I did growing up, but, when the situation calls, I still enjoy shaking the hips and being a little bit of a showoff. So although I've had to struggle through learning to speak Spanish in school instead of being taught by my parents, I still have to thank them for bestowing me with the ability to strut my stuff on the dance floor. It's been more valuable than I would have ever guessed.

(This is one of my favorite scenes from one of my favorite movies White Christmas)

Steve Jobs

For the last few months, I have been reading the Biography of Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson. I just finished it on Friday and I thought I would write a few things that I took away from it. Let me start by saying that I am not an Apple fan-boy. I did not decide to start this book because I believe in every product they make, and in many cases I think they're kind of dumb. My older brother Eric mentioned to me some time last year that he had read it and liked it. I have always been a fan of computers, and tinkering and learning more about them has been a hobby of mine for the last few years. I knew a fair amount of how Steve Jobs made his mark on the history of computers and technology throughout his life, and this book helped to elaborate even more on those aspects and some. However, the interesting part about this book was that, unlike most biographies, this one was written at the request of the subject.

A few years before his death, Steve Jobs approached Walter Isaacson and requested that he write a biography about his life. He even offered to sit down for personal interviews to talk about his past. Steve Jobs, knowing that he had little time left to live, craved for some sort of memorandum to document and hopefully explain his life and his intentions to the world and especially so his children. I connect with that desire in a personal way. It's one of the reasons why I keep this blog. I hope that not only would it show a part of myself to others that would otherwise go unnoticed, but it could possibly be something my future children could look back on in 30 years and could understand the type of person their father was when I was their age. It's always bothered me that my parents never had something similar. The book shows incredible detail of the background and driving force behind a man that impacted in so many ways the lives of millions. Whether you liked him as a person or not (and many did not), he changed the world. He will not be forgotten, and his achievements cannot be downplayed by anyone.

I cannot say that I would want to live his life though. He had many ups and downs, and he angered many people in the process. I do however admire him and his persistence towards achieving the unbelievable. I have struggled for the last few years to find my focus and my great passion in life, but reading the story about a man who so truly knew his life's aspirations gives me hope for my future.

Hilarious Poster

A simply amazing poster I discovered in Dallas yesterday

that I am going to either have to buy or replicate in the near future

First to point out the joke within the poster gets a cookie :-)

Noah's Top 10 Songs From The Past Year

Granted, some of these songs are older and didn't just come out this year. It's more of a 10 songs I discovered and/or was obsessed with during the past year. I am not the most on top of the music scene, and I definitely don't claim to be. Either way, I thought I would change some things up and share some of my favorite songs that I have recently been addicted to. Each song is a link to youtube so you can listen to the song if you like. Enjoy and if you have any suggestions of songs or bands that you feel I should check out, please let me know. I love finding new good music, and word of mouth is typically the only way I find more.

1. Do I Wanna Know - Arctic Monkeys
2. While I'm Alive - Starfucker
3. Eat That Up It's Good For You - Two Door Cinema Club
4. Kangaroo Court - Capital Cities
5. Dance Yrself Clean - LCD Soundsystem
6. Who's Loving You - Michael Bublé
7. Lose Yourself To Dance - Daft Punk
8. Creep (Cover) - Carrie Manolakos
9. 83 - John Mayer
10. Skyfall - Adele

Romance Can Work

Alright, I've been pretty transparent with my most recent posts, so I'm going to admit something that I've only ever told a few people. I absolutely adore the movie Pride and Prejudice. I am man enough to admit that I enjoy romantic movies. I can appreciate absolutely any type of movie as long as it makes sense, has a solid story, and is well made in a technical sense (directing, cinematography, acting, etc). This movie delivers in spades on all accounts. At least for me. I have a group of movies that, when I'm bored, I will go back and re-watch my favorite scenes from. Some have childhood memories associated with them. Some just get me pumped with the perfectly choreographed fight scenes. And some, such as Pride and Prejudice, make me giddy like a 12 year old school girl who just got asked to the 7th grade dance by her long time crush. Let me take it step by step to explain why this movie is so incredible.

Writing/Story: I love the story. I actually have read the book as well, but luckily after I had already fallen in love with the movie. There are obviously deviations from the original story within the movie adaptation, but I approve of most all of them. There are some changes to critical lines and character interactions that attempt to add more drama, but they all made sense to create a compelling 21st century movie. The book was published in 1813; times were very very different back then, so obviously things had to be amended at least a bit.

The story is compelling though. There is a nice ebb and flow between humor, drama, and plenty of complex romantic interactions. I find seeing all of the misunderstandings and issues that arise throughout the story so enjoyable, because, although the story was written over 200 years ago, they are still the sort of stupid problems we all get ourselves into with romantic endeavors. Plenty of over-analysis, ignorant assumptions, and calculated wooing. The dialogue works in every instance. I adore well written and believable dialogue in movies and TV shows. The best part however is that the characters express themselves in the most eloquent and alluring way imaginable. Many lines are written in such a way that it sometimes takes a second to realize if they said an insult or a compliment. Plus, their British accents don't hurt either. Here is one of my favorite lines in the movie as an example of what I mean:

"And those are the words of a gentleman. From the first moment I met you, your arrogance and conceit, your selfish disdain for the feelings of others made me realize that you were the last man in the world I could ever be prevailed upon to marry."

Cinematography/Acting: The movie is beautiful to look at. Every shot has beautiful sprawling landscapes of English countryside or some beautiful villa. The use of natural light is so expertly done. It creates such a genuine look that allows you to truly suspend reality and feel as though you are in the 19th century with these characters. 

The casting works perfectly for each character. There aren't any Megan Foxes or Zac Efrons just thrown in to bring in the little middle school fan girls or boys. Each character looks the part and delivers perfectly with their performances. The chemistry and electricity between each character is practically palpable and is an absolute pleasure to watch.

Music: To me, the music of a movie is incredibly under-appreciated by the average movie watcher. This acute art within film making makes its mark by subtly ushering the audience into the intended emotions of a scene without being overbearing. The best music within movies goes unnoticed until later when you realize tears are welling up in your eyes or you have a stupid grin from ear to ear. It's like a soft breeze that flows through a house that you can't find the source of, but you can still feel its effect. The music in Pride and Prejudice accomplishes this beautifully in my opinion. I could listen to it without the movie and still feel the emotions within the composition. Here is my favorite song from the movie, and it's one that pops up repeatedly throughout. Dawn - Dario Marianelli

Final Words: I realize that I possess some amount of bias towards movies made in Britain, since I've long loved England. Blame it on my longtime obsessions with both Harry Potter and the English Premier League! It really is a fabulously made movie though. It didn't revolutionize the art of movie making, and it won't leave you with great philosophical questions that will cause you to toss and turn at night considering them. It is a prototypical romantic movie that differs by not falling prey to the cheesy and obvious cliches that most movies within this genre succumb to. I know this movie is not for everyone, and many wouldn't appreciate some of the subtle aspects that I do in this movie. But it still makes me happy when I go back and watch those favorite scenes of mine. So, if even one person who reads this ends up going to watch Pride and Prejudice and enjoys it half as much as I do, then this post and my admission as a closet romantic will be completely worth it.

Foot In Mouth Syndrome

I'm sure everyone has experienced that time when they say something that they truly believe to their core, but, after saying it, it just doesn't sit well. Now imagine that happening 2-3 times a week, and you'll get a glimpse of what my life is like!! It rarely is anything malicious or hurtful, but it always causes people to pause with surprise forcing me to explain myself. I have always struggled with filtering my beliefs and comments. Literally since I was a kid it's been around. That over bearing feeling that every stupid thought that flows through my head some how needs expressing due to its inflated magnitude. I have tried to rationalize where this desire comes from. It may have something to do with growing up with four extremely intelligent older brothers and little me hoping that just one of my millions of thoughts might be worthy of their acknowledgment. As the saying goes, "you miss every shot you don't take", so I guess I defaulted to expressing everything that flowed through my young brain to increase my chances!!

Nowadays though, I've always rationalized that those comments that toe the line are worth saying since I may be the only person that has the guts to speak up in this situation and hopefully cause whomever is involved to grow and learn something. Contrary to what people may believe, I never comment on things to intentionally hurt anyone. I am not a spiteful or malicious person.

I recently had a very long talk with my Dad about a whole variety of things, and one of our topics was the fact that I hold such high regard in honesty and expressing my view to anyone and everyone. He told me about how in his experience, extreme honesty tends to alienate others from you rather than creating camaraderie or strong bonds with them. He explained that, to him, holding honesty in such high regard is a way of trying to make yourself feel better about saying things that should go unspoken by simply saying "hey, I'm just being honest". I think that he has a point about that. It's almost as if my being openly honest makes my brain then say "well, why can't all the rest of these people be as honest as I'm being? I'm showing them how easy honesty is!!" That isn't the way it works though. You don't receive honesty from others by being honest. You receive that when you have trust and respect. 

However, although I come to rationalize this with the help and guidance of friends and family, it still isn't the easiest to filter everything that my brain tries to say or keep from getting frustrated when I feel others are not being as honest as my brain tells me they should be. I have my own level of transparency about myself and my thoughts, but I need constant reminders to the fact that others have different levels of openness and honesty that may not be as far down the spectrum as I am. That's perfectly understandable though, and I need to learn to not be as bothered by it. It will save a lot of time for me with not having to constantly remove my foot from my mouth, and probably build a lot stronger relationships with those people that I interact with, which is the most important thing. I enjoy connecting and learning about other people, and my honesty gets in the way far too frequently. I intend to make a point of fixing that going forward. It will be a long road, but acknowledgment is the first step. Wish me luck!

Life As I Know It

Life is complicated. It literally takes my breath away when I sit down and consider its vast complexity. I don't talk much with people I know about my beliefs on creation or spirituality, because, like most people, I prefer talking about things that I understand and can vocalize intelligently about. And this topic is one that I fall well short of holding any sort of solid comprehension of. I have wondered recently about why we as humans are the only species to contemplate our existence and purpose in the world (at least to our knowledge). Why were we as humans gifted such above average mental capacity that we proposed such unanswerable questions?

A humorous question that I recently thought about was that, assuming that some great being set off this chain reaction of evolution back when the universe began, how long would it have taken that great being to see our potential as a dominant species?? Because, for all intents and purposes, we as humans on the surface appear rather docile compared to most animals. If not for our brain, we should have easily been eliminated through natural selection and survival of the fittest years ago. There does not exist another animal that I know of with comparable size and weight to a human that couldn't easily kill us if we fought them weaponless. Or at least I have never been able to think of one. If you can, please let me know.

Even with all of these incredible advantages of intellect, we as humans constantly attempt to add to the complications of our lives and never pause to realize how simple and trivial most problems we experience turn out to be. Everything feels like the end of the world, and every problem always feels insurmountable. The reality of the situation is that the world spun around the sun before our problems, and it's going to keep doing so after we solve them. Everyone feels alone when they experience hardships, but the fact is that many have been in the same situation all throughout history and they surpassed it. I don't know that everything happens for a reason, but I do know that every situation teaches us something unexpected and wonderful about our lives. I am just a young man of twenty-two, and I guarantee my life will be full of obstacles and unexpected hurdles. I'm going through a few of them at this very moment, but I regret none of the decisions that have led me here.

Life is an incredible machine that just keeps turning. It's difficult at times and takes its toll, but the greatest solace I have is the fact that I hold the capacity to appreciate the ride. Make sure you do the same.

Small Talk

So let's have a big talk about small talk. I real dislike small talk. Actually, I don't dislike small talk per say; I just dislike the way people utilize it. I understand the intention that small talk is meant to have, but many people in my opinion fail at grasping its intent. For most people, they rely solely on small talk in order to learn more about the people they meet and from those generic answers decide whether the person warrants continued interaction. To me, this use of small talk completely undermines the purpose of small talk. Small talk is simply a social barrier that must be broken down before really getting to know someone. It's like reading a list of ingredients for a cake except the only items on the list are flour, eggs, and baking powder. Yes, that may make some basic version of a cake, but it won't have any flavor or sweetness. Let me explain.

For all of those questions, I hate that I am solely getting the rehearsed answer that has probably been given to hundreds of people. Every college student has been asked the soul sucking question of "what do you want to do when you graduate?" For me, that question will reveal the absolute smallest amount of discernible information about who you are as a person. Why? Because I know that you've been asked that question dozens of times. Therefore, societies repetitiveness forced you into creating a socially acceptable answer to said question just in order to end the conversation as quickly as possible. This is typically true due to the fact that only about 0.1% of college students have any certainty in their plans after college and find it embarrassing to express that fact to a complete stranger that they just met. I know that I do. Therefore not only do I have to listen and comprehend your response that I know is calculated, but now I have to try and analyze your response in order to find out the what is worth taking from it. Did he pause before answering? That might tip off that he's uncertain about this plan. Did she slip in something about her Dad being an engineer as well? That could mean that she pursued this field and this future plan not out of passion but instead some sort of family influence. This is the sort of stuff going through my head when I'm experiencing small talk. The answers ooze of preconceived thought.

I prefer organic and off the cuff conversations that encourage people to think on their toes and show a side of themselves most rarely attempt or even care to see. These interactions tell a person's true character. I'll do the small talk for a little while as my stepping stone, but I really am simply waiting for the right time to jump in and begin the true interactions. I like to ask questions that make people seriously reflect on something. Sometimes history. Sometimes nature. And sometimes simply on themselves. Nothing tells more about a person than a probing question that they never anticipated. If you are a close friend of mine, you know the sort of questions to which I am referring. Some of my favorites include: would you rather try and survive for 5 minutes against a shark or a brown bear? how many 5 year-old children do you think you could take in a fight on your own? and what single word would you hope all people describe you as? For the record my answers are shark, about 40, and, although my word has typically always been "honest", I have been considering a change to "understanding" instead.

Questions like these create debate and interaction. They spawn environments where people may actually express themselves openly without hiding behind their fabricated responses and peer-pressure. It's a place where the possibility of knowing a person beyond what they simply WANT you to know about them exists. That is the sort of way I want to know people. That is the sort of way I want people to know me. Maybe I'm just crazy and this utopia will never exist where people willfully share themselves and their ideas without reservation, but I like to think that every time I ask these sorts of questions I push the world a little closer to that ideal world that I want to live in. And that seems worth it to me.

New Beginnings

Well, it's been about 11 months since the last time that I posted anything. I had almost completely forgotten about this blog until yesterday read a post from a friend of mine's blog that brought me back and showed me again the reason that I created this blog in the first place. She reminded me of the potential my blog could become. Now I don't truly expect my little blog to ever reach her level. She is probably the best writer I have ever had the pleasure of knowing personally, but, when I read one of her recent posts, there was this incredible feeling of being forced to think about something completely contrary to my normal ideas while still making me enjoy questioning them. The ability to instill that feeling on others resides only with truly gifted writers, and I don't know that I'll ever quite get there. However, I do know that I can try. I already have some ideas for my next blog posts. It's been almost a year since I've been on here; I better have something new to talk about!! I know that I'll enjoy the catharsis of writing random posts and emptying my ever filling brain; I just hope that whomever ends up stumbling upon this tiny corner of the internet enjoys my Spare Thoughts and ramblings even a fraction as much as I do when I read her blog. And maybe some day I can be the inspiration for someone else to create a blog and share their random musings in the same way my friend has been for me. So here's to a new beginnings in a year which holds so many exciting and scary possibilities in my life. I look forward to experiencing each and every one of them.

P.S. Here's the link to my friend's blog if you'd like to check it out. She really is an incredible writer. http://www.emilylaurenalleman.com/